I’m a writer that doesn’t write. 

I guess to be more specific, I’m a writer that doesn’t write the things he wants to write because he’s scared he won’t be good at the one thing he knows he wants to do for a living, and the possibility of having to accept that he’s not good enough to do it would be to depressing to confront. 

In the past, my writing process has usually been something like this: 

1. Come up with an exciting idea
2. Jot down many notes pertaining to the idea
3. Sit down to review the notes and start forming something substantial
4. Get “distracted” by random YouTube rabbit holes

Recently, however, I came to the realization that I just have to sit down and do the damn thing before I regret not doing it. In the past I’ve been too concerned with “getting it right”, thinking that I can’t start without the perfect first sentence, the perfect first paragraph, etc., but in the era of content creation, I think it’s just about getting yourself out there, and fine-tuning whatever skills you want to share with the world as you go. 

As I reach the end of my twenties, I want to start doing more things for myself, and I hope this blog is the beginning of that journey. I have been working as a copywriter in advertising ever since I’ve graduated college, and while it is a very cool career where you get to work with global brands most people only dream of getting to work with, I’ve been craving more creative freedom. 

My goal is to either write a screenplay that gets turned into a movie, or write a book and get it published. I want to see my name on the cover of something and show the entire world proof that I exist. Obviously, some level of financial success would be nice, but I think the opportunity to put something out into the world, and to know that other people believed in it enough to want to help me put it out there would be satisfactory enough.

I no longer want the idea of being a writer to solely be an escapist thought amidst my boring, mundane weekly routine. Of course, I should be proud of everything that I’ve achieved so far, but I also hate seeing myself becoming complacent. I think I’ve been waiting for that proverbial carrot to be put in front of me so I can be motivated to accomplish something, but I think it’s time for me to just put that carrot in front of myself and get myself going. 

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When I was in the second grade, I remember telling people that I wanted to be a writer. Along the way, as reading and writing became high-pressure assignments instead of leisurely activities in school, I think I started to fall out of love with telling stories. It’s strange how life has taken me on this roundabout journey to come back to a childhood passion. Maybe this is me healing my inner child. Maybe it’s me finally figuring out what I want to do without anyone else to influence me. Whatever this blog ends up being, I’m excited that I pushed myself to start something new. 

Here’s to finally getting over the hump!